The Underside

Laura-Lee lived in Berwin Creek, which was not so unremarkable.  What's remarkable, really, is how she ended up six feet underground in the Berwin Creek Cemetery.  Oh, no, no -- I know what you're thinking.  She didn't die -- at least not at this point.  No, she was alive the whole time.  There she was, a seven year-old girl down there with the dead folks, and then living to tell the tale!  She told it to me, of course, and I'll tell it to you, if I can trust that you won't make a big fuss of it.  It's a great little story, but we can't have people from outside hearing it and looking at all of us here like we're crazy, now can we?

Well, here's how it was.  Little Laura-Lee was, like I said, seven years old when it happened.  She lived with her father and brother over there on Tully Street in a nice little two bedroom house.  But it was hard, you know -- she was the only girl in the family then.  Her dear mother had died when she was just a year old, and they hadn't been living in Berwin Creek then.  They were over in Song Lake or Coopersville, or some such place over there.  Anyway her mother died, and then her father had to work a lot, and so they moved here to Berwin Creek so that her grandmother -- that's Laura-Lee's father's mother -- could help take care of the kids while the father worked and was away from home. 

It was her house, the grandmother's house, on Tully Street that they moved into, and the two kids had their own room, the grandmother had her room, and the father just slept on the couch in the living room.  They did that for about four years, I think, and little Laura-Lee, she just loved that grandmother of hers.  Judith was her name, and they called her Grandma Judy.  She was a stout little lady, and always wearing a plain dress with an apron.  Everyone on Tully Street knew her, and you'd see her outside visiting with folks -- always wearing a plain dress and the same red kerchief tied over her curly gray hair whenever she was outside.  And always the front door open -- that dear little lady always forgot to close the door after her when she went out for a visit.

Anyway, I said little Laura-Lee was the only girl in the family over there at the time all this happened, and that's because Grandma Judy died when Laura-Lee was about five.  It broke that poor girl's heart, but what could she do?  She just carried on.  Anyway, the timing was alright, because since she was old enough for kindergarten and her brother Pete was two years older than she was, Grandma Judy didn't need to watch the kids during the day so much then anyway.  But it was sad when she died, all the same, and poor little Laura-Lee was heartbroken.  They kept living in Grandma's house, and the father took Grandma Judy's room, but the house always felt so empty.

Well, Laura-Lee started going to school, and she did alright, but it was kind of hard.  Pete was a bit of a tease, like boys sometimes are, and he didn't always treat her very nice at school.  She just had a hard time of it, given that she hardly saw her father and her dear little grandma was gone.  She didn't have anyone to help her with her homework, and she felt like math was a pretty hard thing to figure out on your own.  And she often did feel so alone.

Well, Laura-Lee made friends with some girls close to her age, and they were alright, but some of them were not nice to her all the time, so it was a bit of an on-and-off relationship that she had with them.  Bethany, who was a couple of years older and lived over in Garfield Street, was a bit of a know-it-all and always seemed to have all the best clothes and toys, and sure wanted everyone else to know it.  All the girls looked up to her for being so grown-up, too.  Ruth Ann was usually nicer than Bethany, but she wanted Bethany to like her so much that whenever Bethany was around, she almost became a completely different person.  Rebecca was just the same.  They just wanted to have Bethany's attention and be liked by her, and they'd go along with whatever she said or did.  You know how those kind of people are, and it's really very sad.

Then there were the twin sisters, Nancy and Brenda, and they were so shy and quiet that whenever Laura-Lee spoke to them, she felt like she had to do the talking for all three of them!  But they were nice, and sometimes they let Laura-Lee come over to their house after school for a snack and some play time.  In fact, it was while Laura-Lee was coming home from Nancy and Brenda's that this whole thing played out.

You see, whenever Laura-Lee was going home from school or from Nancy and Brenda's house she could take the long way around, or she could cut through the Berwin Creek Cemetery -- and that's usually the way she went, was through the cemetery.  The cemetery could be a dreary and even frightful place if one was alone or walking in the dark, but Laura-Lee almost never went through it in the dark, even though she did usually go through it alone.  But dreary as it was, Laura-Lee loved to pass by Grandma Judy's grave and remember the dear old lady's hearty laugh and wrinkly smile.  She missed Grandma Judy, even though a couple of years had passed since she had died.

Well, on this particular day, it was about five o'clock in the evening and it was November, so the shadows were pretty long and the sun was almost gone.  Laura-Lee was coming home from seeing Nancy and Brenda, who had been in a particularly quiet mood.  Despite being with friends, the visit had left Laura-Lee feeling pretty lonesome, and she was sad for herself as she walked along.  It's a funny thing, isn't it, how we can sometimes be among people and still feel alone?

Laura-Lee turned off of Plymouth Street and headed into the cemetery, as she usually did.  Near an old oak tree there was a tall headstone with a cross on top that she always used as a landmark, to help guide her toward Grandma Judy's grave.  She walked towards it, bending under and around tree branches, and dodging around tombstones as she went.  Sometimes she looked at the other headstones as she passed.  She thought Edith Balmwood had a beautiful stone, and she often wondered why Nathan Pershing had died so young, and why Rusty McMaster had an engraving that said, "Until later, old rascal!"

A gust of golden leaves tumbled by as Laura-Lee approached and then passed the tall stone with the cross.  From there it was just a few yards to the south to reach her target.  She arrived as she expected to at Grandma Judy's grave, and yet things at the grave were not as she expected.

Do you know what she saw?  I bet you can't guess.

There was Grandma Judy's grave, same as it ever was.  But there, right beside it, plain as the nose on your face, was a hole.  That's right.  There was a big, rectangular hole in the ground right there beside Grandma Judy's grave, and not only that -- there was a set of steps carved into the dirt, leading right down into that hole.

Well, Laura-Lee, she was quite shocked.  That hole had never been there before.  She had passed that way just yesterday, and no hole had been there.  It might've been another grave, except for the strange steps going down into it.  Laura-Lee stepped closer to the edge of the hole to find that there was an arched passageway, leading from the hole into the underground.  And she was pretty flummoxed.  And who wouldn't be flummoxed, you know?!  What was this hole doing here?  And where did that passageway lead?

Laura-Lee looked around to see if there was anybody else nearby.  Had anyone else seen the hole?  Was it the work of the cemetery diggers?  She saw no one.  Just rays of disappearing sunlight streaming through the trees, lighting gently on the tombstones of the cemetery.  Here and there a bird chirped.  But no one was around.

Laura-Lee glanced back at the hole, and then at the headstone for Grandma Judy.  It had a beautiful flower pattern around the edges, and Laura-Lee remembered standing here for the graveside service just a couple of years before.  She wished immediately that she hadn't thought about that, because just like a crack in a dam, that thought sprank so many little leaks of memories of Grandma Judy.  Playing with toys together, being pushed by Grandma Judy on the playground swings, baking bread and cookies, reading books, talking about monsters under the bed and why they probably weren't real, and if they were, were probably just as scared as Laura-Lee was!  Oh, how she missed Grandma Judy.  She loved and trusted Grandma more than any person in the whole world, and it hurt so much, even still, for her to be gone!  Laura-Lee blinked back several tears, and wiped a few others from her cheek.  What a hard separation that had been for this poor girl!

Suddenly Laura-Lee gave a gasp and looked up as a terrible thought occurred to her.  What if someone had done something to Grandma Judy under the ground!  The passageway in the hole!  It was right next to Grandma Judy's grave!  What if the person who dug the hole had come to steal Grandma Judy away, or do some other such horrible thing!  Laura-Lee hated the thought of this hole, and these stairs, and that passageway right next to Grandma Judy!  What can I do? she thought to herself!  In a moment she answered herself back.  "I think there's really only one thing to do," she said.  "I've got to go down there and find out what's happened!"

"Hold on just a minute," said her first conscience.  Do you ever have that happen, where for a minute you seem to have two consciences?  I've had that happen, too!  Well the first conscience said, "Laura-Lee, you hold on just a minute.  Your dad will be home in a couple of hours, and you could just ask him to look at it."

"It'll be dark by then," said the second conscience.  "Who knows what the hole digger might have done by then!  I've got to do something NOW."

"Go and get Pete," said the first voice.  "He could do it."

"No," said the second.  "He'll just tease me and say I'm a scaredy-cat for not doing it myself.  I'm going down there myself!  Right now!"

And so she did.  One stair after the other, little Laura-Lee crept down the dirt steps, and came to the bottom of the hole.  She looked around nervously, and then moved slowly toward the open passageway.  Was she scared?  Oh, absolutely!  But what choice did she have?  She couldn't let them steal Grandma Judy away.  And so nervously, one little step at a time, she edged into the passageway, bit by bit.

Inside, she found the place quite strange.  The passageway seemed to be lit by little sparkling stones stuck into the walls every few feet.  So while it was generally dark and damp, as you might expect, there was plenty of light to see the floor.  Rocks and tree roots jutted into the passage here and there, but it was nonetheless quite a precise and passable passage.  The air was musty and smelt like dirt and mildew, but it was also strangely sweet.  And the passageway was quite long.  Laura-Lee thought it a bit strange that it didn't seem to run into any caskets as it tunneled through the dirt.  In fact, though the doorway was near to Grandma Judy's grave, the passageway seemed to run right under it and continue through the cemetery.  It bent here and there at all kinds of angles, and Laura-Lee just slowly edged her way along through it, winding this way and that and wondering what this odd tunnel was all about.

Suddenly as she rounded a corner, she bumped face-first into something.  Or, was it someONE?  She gave a frightened yelp and jumped back, getting ready to run.

"Hold it there, hold it there!" came an old man's voice.  "Who's that?"

Laura-Lee froze in place and looked up at her interrogator.  It was a wiry old man in dirty overalls with a full white beard and mustache, and a handsome little straw hat on his head.  In the light he looked very pale, but his eyes were kind as he looked over Laura-Lee.

"Well now!" he said at last, "it's a little girl!  I didn't know we were having anybody new down here today!  How'd you do, there miss?"

"F-f-fine, thanks!" stuttered Laura-Lee.

"Whatch-yer name?" said the old man, placing his hands on his hips.

"I -- I'm Laura-Lee," the girl answered.

"Well, I'm right pleased to meet ya, Laura-Lee," the man said.  "My name is Rusty McMaster!"

Remembering the tombstone she would see as she crossed the lawn to Grandma Judy's grave, Laura-Lee whispered, "Oh -- 'until later, old rascal!""

The old man heard the whisper and chuckled!  "That's right!  That's me!  Glad to meet you!"

"Uh," started Laura-Lee, "but you're... Aren't you... dead?"

At this comment, the old man seemed to understand that something was wrong.

"Oh dear!" he said.  "If you don't know that, it must mean that you... ain't dead?"

"N-n-no, I -- I don't think so," Laura-Lee responded.

Rusty McMaster eyed the girl carefully before answering, "Well bless my soul, indeed you ain't."

He shook his head and breathed a little sigh.  "Oh dear!  Now this is a tricky little mess, isn't my little friend?  Just how did you get in here?"

"I-- well, there was just a big hole in the ground with some stairs and I--"

"Oh, dear, I see!" Rusty said with a chuckle, cutting her off.  "And here was this passage at the bottom o' them stairs, and you came down and here you are!  Is that how it was?"

"Yes!" Laura-Lee answered.

Rusty chuckled again and gave another sigh.

"That," he said, "would be the work of Miss Judy.  That good lady always leaves the door open whenever she goes out for a visit!  I guess she gone out and left the door wide open!"

Laura-Lee, despite the strange circumstances, was delighted to hear this detail.

"That's my Grandma Judy!" she exclaimed!  "She always left the door open when she went out to visit."

Rusty McMaster gave a hearty laugh and said, "Well, some things never change!  Darlin'," he continued, "we're gonna have to get you back up there to the world of the living!  See, this here is the place of the dead folk!  This is where we hang our hats and --"

"Who is that over there, Mr. McMaster?" came a voice from behind the old man.  A pale, but distinguished looking woman in a stately dress came up behind him in the passageway.

"This here is little Miss Laura-Lee," answered the old man.  "It looks like Judy left the door open, and this girl done found her way down here into our place."

"Gracious!" said the woman.  "What a terrible mix-up!  Well, we can set that right!  I can take her back up there right away!"

"I-- I'm sorry, ma'am -- I just wondered...." said Laura-Lee

"Please," said the woman, "You can call me Priscilla.  My name is Priscilla Edmunds, and I'm pleased to meet you, Laura-Lee."

"Oh, yes, thank you, Miss Priscilla," said Laura-Lee -- "I just wondered.  You all said my grandma stays down here with you all?  Do you know her?"

"Judy?" answered Prisiclla.  "We surely do!  Such a warm and lovely lady -- we just love her!"

"Well," Laura-Lee said, "I know I guess I'm not supposed to be here.  I guess you all are the dead folks of the cemetery, and I'm not supposed to be down here with you -- it was just a mistake.  But... I just wondered.... if my Grandma stays here.... can I see her please?"

The old man and the woman exchanged skeptical glances, and then old Rusty shrugged his shoulders.

"We're not supposed to do that," Priscilla said with a smile, "but very well.  The problem is that she's gone out.  In fact, I'm sure that's how she came to leave the door open.  She went to go visit a relative in another cemetery."

"Oh," said Laura-Lee, disappointed that her grandmother wasn't at home -- if you can call a cemetery "home."

"No need to worry, dear," said Priscilla.  "Tell you what we'll do.  I'm sure she'll be back very soon.  I'll give you a tour of the place while you wait.  How does that sound?"

"Sure!" said Laura-Lee!  She never imagined receiving a tour of the underside of the cemetery!

Rusty McMaster tipped his hat and wished Laura-Lee good day, as she followed Priscilla down the passageway.  Together they explored such amazing things as Laura-Lee never had imagined.  Rooms began to branch off of the passageway all over the place.  There was a room for playing board games, and a room for reading books.  There was a kitchen and a dining room.  There was a room with a cozy fire, and a room for knitting and sewing.  One room was a great place for sports.  Laura-Lee simply couldn't fathom how it was all possible.  Best of all, there was a room for simply getting together and talking, and in this room, like all of the others, so many of the dearly departed were gathered together and having a wonderful time.  They all looked quite whole -- like they had on the day they had died.  They were just pale.  Pale, but oh, so happy.

In this last room -- the one for talking -- Priscilla sat down with Laura-Lee and they were just having a good chat when suddenly a familiar little figure appeared in the doorway.  Tears rolled down the pale cheeks of stout little Grandma Judy as she ran from the passageway over to where her granddaughter sat.

"Bless my soul!" she called, "Oh, my dear little Laura-Lee, can that really be you, sweetheart?!"

"It's me, Grandma!" she called back, and the two embraced.  "I got in through the hole you left open," Laura-Lee added with a giggle.

Grandma Judy laughed as they pulled back from their hug -- "Oh, I know, my dear, don't you worry, they gave me an earful about that when I got in just now!  I've got to do better than leaving the door open like that!  It's very much against the rules, you know!  But I'm so glad to see you, dear!  Priscilla, you darling soul, thank you so much for entertaining my little granddaughter!"

Priscilla smiled.  "My pleasure," she said.  "But be sure to keep this quick!  We're breaking the rules, you know!"  And she glided gracefully out of the room.

Grandma Judy sat down beside Laura-Lee and straightened her apron.

"Now then, my dear," she said, "you must tell me everything.  Are you loving school?"

Laura-Lee frowned.

"Not really," she replied.

"Oh?" said Grandma Judy, "why ever not?"

Laura-Lee gave a sigh.

"Grandma, I'm not very smart."

"My granddaughter, not very smart!  La -- that's a tall tale!  Of course you are, dear!"

Laura-Lee shook her head and looked down.

"No, not really.  My math grades aren't very good.  And I don't have very many friends."

Now, at this point most of us would come to the immediate defense of a loved one.  But Grandma Judy, as she always did, knew when a listening ear was more valuable.  So she folded her hands in her lap and said simply, "Go on, Laura-Lee, honey."

"Grandma, Bethany is everyone's favorite.  The other girls all want to be just like her.  Nobody wants to be my friend, or to be just like me.  And she has everything.  And she's so grown-up, Grandma.  The other girls say she's having... changes.  And that they're changing, too.  And they tease me for being... just me.  For not changing, I guess.  I just feel really alone, Grandma.  I miss you so much.  I don't want to change.  I don't want anything to change.  Except I just want to be good at math and feel like I have more friends."

Grandma Judy said nothing for a moment.  The two just sat in silence, as the sound of chatter from other souls around the large room continued.  At length, Grandma Judy lifted her gentle wrinkled hand and took the hand of Laura-Lee.

"Sweetie," she said.  "Can you remind me of something?  Which one was your favorite -- chocolate chip cookies, sugar cookies, or brownies?"

Laura-Lee smiled and gave Grandma a sideways look.  "Grandma, you know that I love all three of those the same!  I could never pick a favorite!  Don't you remember?"

Grandma Judy smiled back.  "Of course I remember.  What did you always tell me about them?  Why didn't you have a favorite?"

"Because they all tasted delicious, of course!  Sometimes I wanted frosting, but sometimes I wanted chocolate, and sometimes I wanted lots of chocolate!"

They chuckled together, and Grandma Judy said, "Yes, that's right.  And you know, just like each of those three treats are all worth the same, all little girls are worth the same, too.  Nobody really gets to be the favorite.  Did you know that there is no girl that's any better than any other?  Bethany isn't better than any other girl."

"She gets better grades," Laura-Lee replied, "And she's better because she's changing and growing up, and has more friends."

Grandma Judy put her arm around Laura-Lee's shoulder and pulled her close.

"My dear child," she said.  "Your old granny never went to school.  I never knew my times tables until I taught myself when I was a grown woman.  And speaking of being a grown woman -- do you know what I found out?  I remember becoming a woman, and not being a little girl anymore.  And you know, I wasn't any better as a woman than I was as a girl!  Sweetie, every girl goes through that change in her own time.  And you will, too.  And it won't matter when.  Because your heart will be every bit as good then as it is now.  Becoming a woman doesn't change who you are, sweetheart.  It doesn't make you any better than you already are.  And you're already one of the best."

Tears were welling in Laura-Lee's eyes because, although her stubborn heart didn't want to believe Grandma Judy, she knew that the old woman's words were both wise and true.  She could hear the emotion choking in her own throat as she asked, "But why don't I have friends, Grandma?  How come I always feel so alone?"

"Honey," the old lady replied, "We're never alone."

"I am," said Laura-Lee, as a tear rolled down her cheek.

Grandma Judy smiled.

"No, dear," she said.  "In fact, do you know who I was visiting just now?"

Laura-Lee shook her head.

"I was over visiting your mother in another graveyard," Grandma said.  "And all we talked about was you and Pete!"

"Really?" said Laura-Lee.  "My mom remembers me?"

"Oh, honey, you bet she does!  La -- she and I talk about you all the time!  She hasn't forgotten you!  How could she ever?!  But I'll bet you didn't even know that, did you?  You didn't know she was thinking of you."

Laura-Lee shook her head again.

"My sweet Laura-Lee," Grandma Judy said.  "That's how our lives are.  Sometimes we think we're alone.  And we never really are.  Why, us dead folks think about living folks all the time, and nobody really knows it.  And even there with the living, you all think about each other all the time, and nobody knows it!  Why, what if this Bethany is thinking all the time how jealous she is about Laura-Lee.  If she was thinking that, but never said anything, why, how would you ever know?  Sweetie, people think about you so much more than you ever realize.  And it isn't just about being thought about, dear, or even about how many friends you have.  When you're doing right, and your heart is good, people will know.  And you'll have everything you could ever need.  Because it's not over once you grow up, my dear.  There are so many things to know and to do, and to learn as a grown-up.  Did you know that?  So do right, and have a good heart, and people will know.  When you're doing that, you'll make it through life, and you'll have the friends you need, honey.  I promise."

The kind old woman wiped a tear from the girl's cheek and gave her a squeeze.

"I remember coming here, my dear.  When I died, and I came here, it was hard.  But I did it.  I got through my trials.  And so can you.  You just have to be brave.  Don't you worry about math, honey, or anything about that Bethany girl.  Take it from an old dead lady.  Life's too short to worry about those things.  There's so much more waiting for you than you know.  Okay?"

Laura-Lee swallowed hard and nodded her head.  Even in the grave, Grandma Judy knew how to say just the right things.  And she thought about them over and over as she chatted some more with Grandma.

In a few minutes, Priscilla poked her head back into the room and smiled at them.  Grandma Judy saw her and nodded, rising to her feet.  She walked together with Laura-Lee, and they talked as they went all the way back through that long passageway, back the way Laura-Lee had come.  When they reached the end, Grandma Judy opened the hole in the ground, and the stairway appeared, like before.  It was dark outside now, and Laura-Lee knew that it must be nearly time for her father to be home.  She gave Grandma Judy one last tearful hug, and then she skipped back up the stairs to the top of the hole.  She turned around in time to see a proud smile from Grandma Judy, and then the hole disappeared.

Laura-Lee started walking quickly back home.  And it was a funny thing.  She was the same as she had been before.  The same girl that went into that hole.  But she was different, too.  She was different, and she would never be quite the same ever again.  She looked up at the night sky as she got close to Tully Street.  She still had her math to do, and she still had to see Bethany the next day.  But she smiled that night as she walked.  Because she could do it now.  She could do it all now.

Well, that's the way the story was.  I know, it's a bit hard to believe.  But I heard it from Miss Laura-Lee herself.  That was lots of years ago, and she's gone down to see her Grandma Judy permanently quite a while back.  But so many things happened to Laura-Lee during her sweet little life.  She lost her father soon after that, and Pete run away.  Nobody knew where he got to.  But Laura-Lee went to live with Nancy and Brenda for her teenage years, and then she married a nice fellow from the other side of town.  They had a few kids together, but they lost one of them in an auto accident, poor dears.  Laura-Lee saw so much change.  So many things that just wouldn't stay still.  But you know, she really did have a good, happy life.  She did so much.  She was such a strength to so many people in this town.  She did lots of work with the school, and quite a bit with her church, and had a very productive life.  But nearly every time I saw Laura-Lee she told me that story, about her visit to the underside of the cemetery.  I remember one time she told it, feeling especially thoughtful as it seemed.  And she finished telling the story, and she said to me, "You know, I believe that dead folks give the very best advice."  She said, "You know, in the end, it's just one single word."  And I said, "what's that, Laura-Lee?"  And she said, "It's just this:  Live."